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Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:17 am
by mexicant
My girlfriend has 2 problems. One is the fact that every time she gets drunk she gets mean. She always looks for a fight, or a way to make me feel like shit. The other problem is that every morning after she gets drunk she has an explosive watery shit. One night she pushed me to far.

She was drunk of course and felling a little frisky so we we messing around and I tried to put it in the butt, she got mad and started talking shit, about how I'm no good and my dick is small, and that she probably wouldn't even feel it. so we never did have sex.

After she went to sleep I couldn't get the pain of her saying my dick was small out of my head. I wanted to embarrass her as much as she embarrassed me. So I got an Idea

I went to my closet and grabbed this old bag of marbles. I then went to my secret stash and got a bottle of lube. I could just image her reactions when she Sh*T marbles the next morning. I lubed them up one at a time and slowly pushed each one in. About a twenty in all. I got so excited I jerked off then giggled my self to sleep.

The next morning I woke up so excited I couldn't stand it. I made alot of noise getting dressed so she would wake up. She did and not 3 minutes later she said " oh my stomach. not again" and ran to the bathroom. I was in thee brushing my teeth. Usually she would tell me to leave but the urge was to intense. She sat down and let it rip.

She dam near had a heart attack from the noise. The marbles hitting the porcelain sounded like a machine gun going off in the bathroom. She turned white as a sheet and stood up. Still shitting all over the place. Marbles rolling all over the floor as they bounced around. It took her a couple of minutes to put it all together. She said " What the HELL" I just laughed and laughed as she packed her crap and left.

I really do kind of miss her though.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:23 am
by acetamino
my girlfriend texts me too much

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:34 am
by Cage
Hahaha! Thanks for the laugh chris.

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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:41 am
by hypnotik_
please say you had the same facial expression you have in your avatar picture while that happened

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:50 am
by motive
saw "girlfriend" and "mexicant" on the same screen and immediately knew it was a joke thread

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:58 am
by mogers
motive wrote:saw "girlfriend" and "mexicant" on the same screen and immediately knew it was a joke thread

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 10:03 am
by CraftyDus
mexicant wrote: I lubed them up one at a time and slowly pushed each one in
That's the sort of dedicated sense of purpose and concentrated focus one can admire...

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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:24 am
by kirk
This happened.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:37 am
by tenks
I remember my first time shoving marbles in my gf's ass.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:48 am
by seanality
tenks wrote:I remember my first time shoving marbles in my bf's ass.
fixed

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:51 am
by mexicant
motive wrote:saw "girlfriend" and "mexicant" on the same screen and immediately knew it was a joke thread


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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 12:49 pm
by tenks
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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 2:05 pm
by Jjjj
mexicant wrote:My girlfriend has 2 problems. One is the fact that every time she gets drunk she gets mean. She always looks for a fight, or a way to make me feel like shit. The other problem is that every morning after she gets drunk she has an explosive watery shit. One night she pushed me to far.
Not sure if telling the right story




or he just accuse he's girlfriend to get answers for himself,since he have problems...

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 2:41 pm
by Ken
This reminds me of that one time when Liah got raped.

/endstory

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 2:42 pm
by Rambizzle
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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 3:43 pm
by knockout
Ken wrote:This reminds me of that one time when Liah got raped.

/endstory

raped by a dod player WHO FOREVER REMAINED UNNAMED.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 3:49 pm
by Ken
knockout wrote:
Ken wrote:This reminds me of that one time when Liah got raped.

/endstory

raped by a dod player WHO FOREVER REMAINED UNNAMED.
Apparently she got drunk with a DoD player, he gave her dat dick she wanted, then threw it in the butt.

Needless to say she's pretty butthurt about the whole ordeal.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 5:43 pm
by Jakimo
next time make sure u count them and make sure they all turn up. if one of those got lodged in there she could die and you would be in big doo doo.

what i dont understand is the talking shit to your dick part. she gets mad and just talks shit? put that bitch in her place

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 5:52 pm
by stealthlol
I don't think this many people fell for the story last time it was posted.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Sun Jun 24, 2012 6:16 pm
by stile
Wow. What an original story! Haven't heard this one before!

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 7:05 am
by Ken
stealthlol wrote:I don't think this many people fell for the story last time it was posted.
Newjacks, Kevin. Newjacks.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 7:20 am
by cassinoroyale
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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Tue Jun 26, 2012 8:08 pm
by 3SidedQuarter
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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Tue Jun 26, 2012 9:22 pm
by mogers
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Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Tue Jun 26, 2012 10:13 pm
by Cage
The guy behind jay-z got a serious smack to the face.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2012 9:39 am
by jigsawww
funny should have put her cellphone up her ass then called it.

Re: Girlfriend issues.

Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2012 10:41 am
by Jb_
motive wrote:saw "girlfriend" and "mexicant" on the same screen and immediately knew it was a joke thread