Real Life Question

Just_Ben · Post by **Just_Ben** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 1:34 pm

Hey guys, some of ya know me (look at my neg rep!) and some don't but I am looking for some advice from people in the same situation. I already know i'll get the handful who just want to say negative shit, but hoping to hear some real advice.

I am almost 40 now (i know, a dinosaur for playing games), I have a full time + job, 4 kids, and been married for 15 years now. I have a full and busy life, yet I manage to still squeeze in time for DoD.

Recently I have thought I should quit DoD to focus more on my "real" life, although I am not neglecting anything there. I sometimes just think that instead of spending the time playing DoD I should be focusing somewhere else.....wife, kids, business, etc.

My biggest issue is that I have been playing DoD forever now. I love the game. Yes it's old, but so am I. It's simple, it's easy, not much changes. I don't have to hit a 33 button combo to throw a grenade, while firing my rocket launcher, while stabbing a guy in the chest with a table leg.....all while on the last flag (ultimately saving the universe in the process). I have friends I have played with for years and years. I've been off and on in TPG and love the competition. I finally have the opportunity to move "up" in the league and although I am still a lowly IM player, I enjoy the challenge of moving up with a group of friends.

I've been in several clans, ran a clan, been in a community, and now, running solo. Just playing in pubs and running with guys from my scrim team. I have had the opportunity to play with a lot of good peeps and have met several of them in my traveling. I would equate my time playing DoD as some people do for going to hang out at the bar. I'm just having some fun with the "guys."

How do you guys time manage? and does it interfere with other aspects of your life?

Thanks for listening.

motive · Post by **motive** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 1:55 pm

this is definitely a thread on the internet

Sears · Post by **Sears** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 1:58 pm

nunz · Post by **nunz** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 2:01 pm

Hey ben i dont know you at all but i have to say i really dont see much wrong with putting in some dod time. For people to have success in their life they always need a getaway or hobby to even out his days. Im not a life coach or anything but I dont see the harm in it, I wouldnt beat yourself up about it, i mean aslong as you dont neglect your important life things for dod that is, its just like playing in a beer league baseball team i guess.

cheers

toxinatoR · Post by **toxinatoR** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 2:06 pm

chuck doesn't manage dod. He is dod.

Airnick15 · Post by **Airnick15** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 2:29 pm

This might be too serious for the gif experts around here.

bleargh · Post by **bleargh** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 2:43 pm

You should schedule time(s) with your team to play and then not play outside of those times. I know it seems obvious but it works!

...he posts from his work computer

cassinoroyale · Post by **cassinoroyale** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 2:55 pm

Airnick15 wrote:This might be too serious for the gif experts around here.

I don't usually agree with Airnick but thats one of the few situations around that I couldn't agree more.

Before throwing up any advice, if there is any, you pretty much seem to be very reasonable in how much time you dedicate in DoD I feel compelled to start saying that first of all I'm not that busy nor "old" as you (I'm 25 yet) but I'm already married and have a full time job (8-10 hours mon through fri, overtime hours paid). No kids. Yet. I have some awkward work flexibility that makes my duty schedule being very smooth most of the time (I'm God's gift to financial spreadsheets and Excel usage) so I can pretty much be online all day over steam, check my personal stuff and nerd around 1911. I'm not sure if I will be able to get the same job conditions but I'm rather sure if the time of getting a new job comes I will never find one like I have ever again. Not in my area of expertise at least. So I'm fairly sure that I'll have to quit DoD or at least being involved in the community as much as I am. Same as when me and my wife get our first kid.

I know that some people are fathers already, some of them have almost the same age as you do and they still play DoD. You said you quitted and returned sometimes also, which lead me to believe that you had to put something in order your real life (like getting your first kid or something). Speaking which I think that playing DoD or any other videogame is pretty much as the same as an hobby, like collecting stamps or marbles, aeromodelling, you name it. As long as it not interfere with your life duties like getting your bills and mortgage being paid and your kids knowing that you exist for them it is perfectly normal and even healthy having this a way of getting rid of stress. My wife in fact like the fact I'm stuck behind a shiny led monitor instead of getting to happy hours with coleagues so that is always plus. All in all, you pretty much seem to be very reasonable in how much time you dedicate in DoD. Otherwise you wouldn't still be married by slightly more time than DoD very existence.

Last but not least, plus rep for throwing up this out there even though knowing that pretty much everyone here - myself included - is a nerd hater loser n00b who still play DoD in 2012 lololol. +REP!

Airnick15 · Post by **Airnick15** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:01 pm

cassinoroyale wrote:I don't usually agree with Airnick

Really? I think most of my posts fall into logicland. I confused.

james- · Post by **james-** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:02 pm

Play to have fun, if you find yourself nerd raging, go play with your kids or something.

Nothing wrong with playing games as long as you're not neglecting anything (which it doesn't seem that you are)

glhfmakebacon.

cassinoroyale · Post by **cassinoroyale** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:04 pm

Airnick15 wrote:
cassinoroyale wrote:I don't usually agree with Airnick
Really? I think most of my posts fall into logicland.

Yeah, but the other part of your posts are mostly you jerking around trying to be being a smart-ass

kirk · Post by **kirk** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:11 pm

Airnick15 wrote:This might be too serious for the gif experts around here.

Challenge accepted.

t`RavE · Post by **t`RavE** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:16 pm

Sears wrote:
toxinatoR wrote:

t`RavE · Post by **t`RavE** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:23 pm

alex kirk wrote:
Airnick15 wrote:This might be too serious for the gif experts around here.
Challenge accepted.

toxinatoR · Post by **toxinatoR** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:51 pm

alex kirk wrote:
Airnick15 wrote:This might be too serious for the gif experts around here.
Challenge accepted.

kirk · Post by **kirk** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:55 pm

toxinatoR wrote:

toxinatoR · Post by **toxinatoR** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:59 pm

alex kirk wrote:

kirk · Post by **kirk** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 4:02 pm

toxinatoR wrote:

unpro · Post by **unpro** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 4:39 pm

most guys your age watch the news for an hour, a specific tv show or something similar. you play dod for an hour or so a day - if that. the only difference between them is your interacting with the shit happening on the screen.

kirk · Post by **kirk** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 4:44 pm

unpro wrote:most guys your age watch the news for an hour, a specific tv show or something similar. you play dod for an hour or so a day - if that. the only difference between them is your interacting with the shit happening on the screen.

Also those people watching the news aren't wearing WWII replica helmets.

unpro · Post by **unpro** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 4:46 pm

but they are agreeing with glenn beck.

t`RavE · Post by **t`RavE** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 4:47 pm

unpro wrote:but they are agreeing with glenn beck.

And attending Tea party rallies after church on sundays.

SKiNnTo · Post by **SKiNnTo** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 4:52 pm

Nunz and Cass said it best. Its your hobby or get-a-way time and it doesn't interfere with you real life. No problems~

Traize · Post by **Traize** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 5:04 pm

Just_Ben wrote: does it interfere with other aspects of your life?

If this was still around 2004-2005, I wouldn't be surprised if 100+ people said "yes".

joeledmunds · Post by **joeledmunds** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 5:13 pm

Fuck bitches get money

unpro · Post by **unpro** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 6:11 pm

Traize wrote:
Just_Ben wrote: does it interfere with other aspects of your life?

If this was still around 2004-2005, I wouldn't be surprised if 100+ people said "yes".

oh would i.

Post by **D-bo** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 6:20 pm

cassinoroyale wrote:
Airnick15 wrote:This might be too serious for the gif experts around here.
I don't usually agree with Airnick but thats one of the few situations around that I couldn't agree more.

Before throwing up any advice, if there is any, you pretty much seem to be very reasonable in how much time you dedicate in DoD I feel compelled to start saying that first of all I'm not that busy nor "old" as you (I'm 25 yet) but I'm already married and have a full time job (8-10 hours mon through fri, overtime hours paid). No kids. Yet. I have some awkward work flexibility that makes my duty schedule being very smooth most of the time (I'm God's gift to financial spreadsheets and Excel usage) so I can pretty much be online all day over steam, check my personal stuff and nerd around 1911. I'm not sure if I will be able to get the same job conditions but I'm rather sure if the time of getting a new job comes I will never find one like I have ever again. Not in my area of expertise at least. So I'm fairly sure that I'll have to quit DoD or at least being involved in the community as much as I am. Same as when me and my wife get our first kid.

I know that some people are fathers already, some of them have almost the same age as you do and they still play DoD. You said you quitted and returned sometimes also, which lead me to believe that you had to put something in order your real life (like getting your first kid or something). Speaking which I think that playing DoD or any other videogame is pretty much as the same as an hobby, like collecting stamps or marbles, aeromodelling, you name it. As long as it not interfere with your life duties like getting your bills and mortgage being paid and your kids knowing that you exist for them it is perfectly normal and even healthy having this a way of getting rid of stress. My wife in fact like the fact I'm stuck behind a shiny led monitor instead of getting to happy hours with coleagues so that is always plus. All in all, you pretty much seem to be very reasonable in how much time you dedicate in DoD. Otherwise you wouldn't still be married by slightly more time than DoD very existence.

Last but not least, plus rep for throwing up this out there even though knowing that pretty much everyone here - myself included - is a nerd hater loser n00b who still play DoD in 2012 lololol. +REP!

theshizz · Post by **theshizz** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 6:32 pm

Just_Ben wrote:business, etc.
I don't have to hit a 33 button combo to throw a grenade, while firing my rocket launcher, while stabbing a guy in the chest with a table leg.....all while on the last flag (ultimately saving the universe in the process).

does no one else do this every scrim?

CharlieGiteau · Post by **CharlieGiteau** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 6:53 pm

Sounds like to me that someone is complaining in your household about your hobby. Myself, I'm 30, married with a 6 year old and one on the way(just found out she's 6 weeks, looking for father now to get child support). I too have a full time job working 40+ hours a week fixing locomotives so you assholes get the shit you need for everyday life. My wife says to me occasionally, "Are you almost done on there?" or the "You're really going to get on and play? How long?". Always followed by the inevitable sigh.

There are times we have a pretty serious conversation about it, and I simply say to her "Well, I guess I could go meet my coworkers at the bar or whatever, would you rather that be my hobby?". Basically I do what you do, make sure shit is taken care of, including time with my family, AND make sure I have time for the things that I enjoy. She eventually realizes things could be much worse, and in the end is glad I'm home and not out dicking around and her not knowing what's going on.

So, to answer your question, no. It could if I allowed it, but most of us are adults here, and it doesn't get to that point.

arnsk · Post by **arnsk** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 6:59 pm

[youtube]DA43DS2c12c[/youtube]

Because I feel like it

Badger · Post by **Badger** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 7:27 pm

well I say play but to have fun at this point in your case, I mean if you feel like playing competativly is having a impact on your real life with your family and work and all then take it easy from playing so much. If you feel though that Its not going to be much of a problem, dont worry and continue playing like you normally do and just have fun.

acetamino · Post by **acetamino** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 9:47 pm

defrag · Post by **defrag** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:30 pm

If you enjoy the game, you play it and figure it out with what time you have available.

If you feel you need to juggle your schedule to find time for DoD, than maybe this point in your life isn't the right time for DoD.

.......or just play in open and show up on Sundays only

ohhhhbeeee · Post by **ohhhhbeeee** » Mon Apr 30, 2012 11:13 pm

You can always just show up on Sundays for matches if you feel you need to scale down on the fragging.

knockout · Post by **knockout** » Tue May 01, 2012 3:19 am

all i got out of this is that scott harris is a big nerdlololooool420weed

knockout · Post by **knockout** » Tue May 01, 2012 3:22 am

theshizz wrote:
Just_Ben wrote:business, etc.
I don't have to hit a 33 button combo to throw a grenade, while firing my rocket launcher, while stabbing a guy in the chest with a table leg.....all while on the last flag (ultimately saving the universe in the process).
does no one else do this every scrim?

well you try to do that, but when you just get started on the combo i rape you while prone in a corner you never knew existed.

badnewspanda · Post by **badnewspanda** » Tue May 01, 2012 5:39 am

What is this "real life" you speak of?

lolinus · Post by **lolinus** » Tue May 01, 2012 6:32 am

Kill your family and play whenever you want, problem solved.

Rob · Post by **Rob** » Wed May 02, 2012 3:27 pm

Didn't read this, but I saw the topic and the wall of text, so that's enough for me to dole out wisdom, which everyone in this community sorely needs from me.

Ben my boy,

1. Hit the gym.

2. Lawyer up.

3. Delete your Facebook.

tenks · Post by **tenks** » Wed May 02, 2012 7:16 pm

Ben if you start looking at your dod playing habit as more of a hobby than something as a negative or something you shouldn't be doing, than I think everything else will find a way to work itself out. You have a wife and kids, yes, don't neglect them but also don't neglect your own personal interests.

Just_Ben · Post by **Just_Ben** » Fri May 04, 2012 1:59 pm

Thanks for the reply's guys! I agree, DoD is more of a hobby and really not addictive (yes it is). Luckily for me, my wife (of 15 years) also played for years and years (before some assholes spoiled it for her) and she doesn't give me too hard of a time about playing. The only person I really get shit from is my 16 year old who wants to know why I play such an old game instead of COD. I grounded him his ass and took his Xbox (j/k).

Not too sound too corny, but it is nice to have a community to talk to.

Jb_ · Post by **Jb_** » Fri May 04, 2012 3:48 pm

I would seriously shit diamonds before id ask these clowns for advice. Just sayin...

InSaNe · Post by **InSaNe** » Fri May 04, 2012 6:12 pm

- 2-3 scrim nights a week.
- Stay away from the computer on off nights.

Done.

Oh wait, Diablo 3 is coming out soon, when not scrimming, play D3 every possible second you can put into it

Rambizzle · Post by **Rambizzle** » Fri May 04, 2012 6:19 pm

bonerhaus · Post by **bonerhaus** » Fri May 04, 2012 6:43 pm

On a roll Ricky, keep em coming.

Rated-R · Post by **Rated-R** » Fri May 04, 2012 7:10 pm

First, I'd agree that online gaming has become one of the biggest hobbies in the mature community today and it can, and often does, cause arguments within families. I have been playing Day of Defeat since 2005 and my girl and I got into some pretty heated arguments not just over the game, because she was well aware of it being my hobby, but because she felt I was not paying her much attention. At first I'd let my pride and ego get in the way and would be like, "I wasn't on that long! You're over exaggerating! Why don't you go find something to do like clean the damn house up you dirty a$$ ho." Well, maybe not in those exact words but you get the picture. I mean, there would be times I was so afraid to get in an argument with her about my game playing that I would literally run back and forth from the computer to the window to see if her car was in the drive-way so that I could exit out of Steam before she walked in. After awhile, I got tired of it. Why should I be embarrassed of any hobby of mine? I got the thinking, and then put my foot down. I sat her down, and my family and we discussed things that we could do as a family. Family life never suffered, we always went to dinners, trips, shows ,movies, did sports together, shopping, we had fun. Nobody was really negatively affected by my game play except for my wife.

She and I talked and I told her I will never just "stop" playing Day of Defeat or Call of Duty: Black Ops", just like she will never stop spending my money on dishes, several outfits a week, getting her hair and nails done, and on gas money to pick up her disrespectful adult children. So we compromised. I feel like we are all adults here. As long as you're doing the right thing, paying your bills and home with the family every night, there really isn't a reason why you can't play your game and maintain a healthy family environment at home. Real men make that shit happen, not give up in order to make his wife/spouse happy or feel "loved or wanted". That's why you married her, right? You could be out doing something worse....MUCH worse. Sounds like she needs to be the one compromising.

Schmiggs · Post by **Schmiggs** » Sat May 05, 2012 1:11 pm

I basically have 2 vices, poker and video games. My wife has come to understand that if I am bored I will be doing one of those two things. I usually try to do them when my wife and daughter either aren't home or are sleeping. She has accepted that I have a weekly poker game I always attend and I play DoD on Sunday nights. It has taken a lot of getting used to by her and it still annoys the piss out of her, but she understands that both are things I enjoy doing. I guess it really depends on your old lady and how understanding she is. I don't play for 4 hours each day like I used to, but if I get on once or twice to scrim or 12 man each week I am doing OK.

Traize · Post by **Traize** » Sun May 06, 2012 5:25 pm

Rated-R wrote:She and I talked and I told her I will never just "stop" playing Day of Defeat or Call of Duty: Black Ops", just like she will never stop spending my money on .... gas money to pick up her disrespectful adult children.

+rep just for that~

SpoonIsBad · Post by **SpoonIsBad** » Sun May 06, 2012 9:21 pm

I had a girlfriend tell me quit playing dod once. I just skinned her, and now I wear her while I play.... Oddly enough, it' feels about like wearing blue revolvers gaming glove.

CharlieGiteau · Post by **CharlieGiteau** » Sun May 06, 2012 10:42 pm

SpoonIsBad wrote:I had a girlfriend tell me quit playing dod once. I just skinned her, and now I wear her while I play.... Oddly enough, it' feels about like wearing blue revolvers gaming glove.